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	Comments on: Homily: Some Men Have An Attitude Problem (plus Tweets)	</title>
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	<description>My take on our world</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Sun, 11 Mar 2018 20:41:27 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>
		By: Heather Hastie		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-23123</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Heather Hastie]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 11 Mar 2018 20:41:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-23123</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-23107&quot;&gt;Amy Carparelli&lt;/a&gt;.

Of course it depends on context and situation. A lot of those things are fine in some circumstances - if you go to a comedy show you expect to hear jokes about sex, and other things too, that would be inappropriate in other circumstances. 

If you ever get the chance to listen to older women who were in jobs where they worked with a lot of men in the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s, you will hear that the environment was very different back then, though constantly improving. The fact you don&#039;t recognize staring pleases me greatly because it means you&#039;ve never been on the receiving end of unwanted lascivious stares. Believe me, it&#039;s revolting and creepy! The fact that you&#039;re not seeing an issue with a lot of those things near the bottom is good, because it means those things are happening less often in inappropriate contexts, and younger women (and men) are not having to deal with them.

Twitter is always going to be a difficult environment. Things like nuance, context, body language etc. are missing so misinterpretation happens. People who have suffered in the past will be more sensitized. Some people are just obsessive. They get so carried away with being seen to do the right thing, they&#039;re incapable of normal relationships. They are often hurtful, and nothing you do will please them. Early on with Twitter, I found it extremely difficult. I suffered a big attack about 5-6 weeks in. I have no idea what it was about now, but I was going to leave. In the end I just decided to stick to my principles, try not to let myself down, and block the a$$ho£€s. They&#039;re not worth it. ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-23107">Amy Carparelli</a>.</p>
<p>Of course it depends on context and situation. A lot of those things are fine in some circumstances &#8211; if you go to a comedy show you expect to hear jokes about sex, and other things too, that would be inappropriate in other circumstances. </p>
<p>If you ever get the chance to listen to older women who were in jobs where they worked with a lot of men in the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s, you will hear that the environment was very different back then, though constantly improving. The fact you don&#8217;t recognize staring pleases me greatly because it means you&#8217;ve never been on the receiving end of unwanted lascivious stares. Believe me, it&#8217;s revolting and creepy! The fact that you&#8217;re not seeing an issue with a lot of those things near the bottom is good, because it means those things are happening less often in inappropriate contexts, and younger women (and men) are not having to deal with them.</p>
<p>Twitter is always going to be a difficult environment. Things like nuance, context, body language etc. are missing so misinterpretation happens. People who have suffered in the past will be more sensitized. Some people are just obsessive. They get so carried away with being seen to do the right thing, they&#8217;re incapable of normal relationships. They are often hurtful, and nothing you do will please them. Early on with Twitter, I found it extremely difficult. I suffered a big attack about 5-6 weeks in. I have no idea what it was about now, but I was going to leave. In the end I just decided to stick to my principles, try not to let myself down, and block the a$$ho£€s. They&#8217;re not worth it. </p>
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		<title>
		By: Amy Carparelli		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-23107</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Amy Carparelli]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 11 Mar 2018 11:25:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-23107</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Hello Heather,

Some of the subjects mentioned near the bottom of the graph regarding ‘sexual harassment’ can be difficult to define or at least depending on circumstances.

‘Light hearted flirting’ for example is something I’ve been accused of on Twitter just because I was having conversations with men. I even had somebody accuse me of ‘flirting’ with a man who as I pointed out to them is my dad.

‘Winking’ for example. As I Tweeted about late last year I had recently had 8 people wink at me over a period of time. Most of these people were female friends and colleagues. All the people I know well and not one of those situations was harassment or sexual. 

‘Staring’ I have no idea what is meant by this. 

‘Whistling’ are we talking about a stranger or about a friend trying to get my attention?

‘Sniggering or laughing’ could mean anything. I’ve done that when I knew the person was trying to have a laugh with somebody else and I couldn’t keep a straight face, and I’ve done that when what the other person was saying was in my opinion ridiculous and laughable. 

‘Making a sexual joke’ from my experience many people do that as do comedians on stage.

The problem with the graph is some of the things listed depend a lot on the circumstances and they haven’t been given a clear definition to go by.
Also, we must remember these situations work all ways: Men with women, women with men, men with men, women with women etc. 
Some of the things mentioned on the top of the graph go beyond ‘sexual harassment’. 

‘Making sexual comments about somebody’s body’ – Does this include compliments I’ve made about another woman’s hair or outfit? Does this include several compliments my dad has received from one of his female colleagues?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hello Heather,</p>
<p>Some of the subjects mentioned near the bottom of the graph regarding ‘sexual harassment’ can be difficult to define or at least depending on circumstances.</p>
<p>‘Light hearted flirting’ for example is something I’ve been accused of on Twitter just because I was having conversations with men. I even had somebody accuse me of ‘flirting’ with a man who as I pointed out to them is my dad.</p>
<p>‘Winking’ for example. As I Tweeted about late last year I had recently had 8 people wink at me over a period of time. Most of these people were female friends and colleagues. All the people I know well and not one of those situations was harassment or sexual. </p>
<p>‘Staring’ I have no idea what is meant by this. </p>
<p>‘Whistling’ are we talking about a stranger or about a friend trying to get my attention?</p>
<p>‘Sniggering or laughing’ could mean anything. I’ve done that when I knew the person was trying to have a laugh with somebody else and I couldn’t keep a straight face, and I’ve done that when what the other person was saying was in my opinion ridiculous and laughable. </p>
<p>‘Making a sexual joke’ from my experience many people do that as do comedians on stage.</p>
<p>The problem with the graph is some of the things listed depend a lot on the circumstances and they haven’t been given a clear definition to go by.<br />
Also, we must remember these situations work all ways: Men with women, women with men, men with men, women with women etc.<br />
Some of the things mentioned on the top of the graph go beyond ‘sexual harassment’. </p>
<p>‘Making sexual comments about somebody’s body’ – Does this include compliments I’ve made about another woman’s hair or outfit? Does this include several compliments my dad has received from one of his female colleagues?</p>
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		<title>
		By: Steven in Tokyo		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19994</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Steven in Tokyo]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 Dec 2017 10:47:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19994</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19993&quot;&gt;j.a.m.&lt;/a&gt;.

From the mouth of one who&#039;s always repeating its delusional pronouncements. Good for a laugh!]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19993">j.a.m.</a>.</p>
<p>From the mouth of one who&#8217;s always repeating its delusional pronouncements. Good for a laugh!</p>
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		<title>
		By: j.a.m.		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19993</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[j.a.m.]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 Dec 2017 08:07:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19993</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19985&quot;&gt;nicky&lt;/a&gt;.

Indeed you keep repeating, but alas, wishful repetition does not make it so.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19985">nicky</a>.</p>
<p>Indeed you keep repeating, but alas, wishful repetition does not make it so.</p>
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		<title>
		By: j.a.m.		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19992</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[j.a.m.]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 07 Dec 2017 06:56:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19992</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19951&quot;&gt;darrelle&lt;/a&gt;.

St. Kateri Tekakwitha is a famous Native American saint.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kateri_Tekakwitha]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19951">darrelle</a>.</p>
<p>St. Kateri Tekakwitha is a famous Native American saint.</p>
<p><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kateri_Tekakwitha" rel="nofollow ugc">https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kateri_Tekakwitha</a></p>
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		<title>
		By: Heather Hastie		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19989</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Heather Hastie]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Dec 2017 20:49:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19989</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19985&quot;&gt;nicky&lt;/a&gt;.

I think that&#039;s what it is too.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19985">nicky</a>.</p>
<p>I think that&#8217;s what it is too.</p>
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		<title>
		By: Mark R.		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19987</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Mark R.]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Dec 2017 18:23:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19987</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19983&quot;&gt;darrelle&lt;/a&gt;.

And it&#039;s getting worse.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19983">darrelle</a>.</p>
<p>And it&#8217;s getting worse.</p>
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		<title>
		By: nicky		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19986</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[nicky]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Dec 2017 17:22:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19986</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19966&quot;&gt;nicky&lt;/a&gt;.

&quot;taught&quot; not &quot;thought&quot;, this time I &lt;i&gt;do&lt;/i&gt;,/i&#062; blame spellchecker.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19966">nicky</a>.</p>
<p>&#8220;taught&#8221; not &#8220;thought&#8221;, this time I <i>do</i>,/i&gt; blame spellchecker.</p>
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		<title>
		By: nicky		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19985</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[nicky]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Dec 2017 17:17:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19985</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19955&quot;&gt;Heather Hastie&lt;/a&gt;.

I think those 2+ million illegal voters is due to
 - people who moved states, died etc. wIthout being struck from the voter roll in their previous state.There is no report, however, that any of these people voted more than once. (Heck, even Mr Trump&#039;s buddy Mr Bannon did not get himself struck from Florida&#039;s roll when he moved out)
- a silly extrapolation from some small &#039;studies&#039; [ https://www.snopes.com/illegal-immigrants-2008-election/ ]
As I keep repeating, the real fraud was voter disenfranchisement and &#039;irregularities&#039; in the counting.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19955">Heather Hastie</a>.</p>
<p>I think those 2+ million illegal voters is due to<br />
 &#8211; people who moved states, died etc. wIthout being struck from the voter roll in their previous state.There is no report, however, that any of these people voted more than once. (Heck, even Mr Trump&#8217;s buddy Mr Bannon did not get himself struck from Florida&#8217;s roll when he moved out)<br />
&#8211; a silly extrapolation from some small &#8216;studies&#8217; [ <a href="https://www.snopes.com/illegal-immigrants-2008-election/" rel="nofollow ugc">https://www.snopes.com/illegal-immigrants-2008-election/</a> ]<br />
As I keep repeating, the real fraud was voter disenfranchisement and &#8216;irregularities&#8217; in the counting.</p>
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		<title>
		By: darrelle		</title>
		<link>https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19983</link>

		<dc:creator><![CDATA[darrelle]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Dec 2017 14:31:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.heatherhastie.com/?p=5524#comment-19983</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[In reply to &lt;a href=&quot;https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19978&quot;&gt;j.a.m.&lt;/a&gt;.

You are delusional.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In reply to <a href="https://www.heatherhastie.com/homily-men-attitude-problem-plus-tweets/#comment-19978">j.a.m.</a>.</p>
<p>You are delusional.</p>
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